Yes, it's been a really busy month. Renovation, moving, furniture shopping on the personal side, and starting a course, ad hoc admin work, reviewing six theses, and working on about 7-8 papers/projects on the work side. I was working long hours again, and feeling the building up of the stress. As my bump grew, I have pretty much accepted the fact that my back pain and stomach problems would be with me until I give birth, if not longer. Sitting in front of the computer all day and being busy didn't really help any of the symptoms/pregnancy discomfort.
It's funny how going to see the u clinic dr helped. My intention was just to refill my stomach gas and gastric reflux meds as their effects have become less obvious after the first fee days I used them. I also went in to consult the dr about my eczema. It all started when I alluded to my stress, saying that "I'm not sure why my stomach gas and reflux haven't improved, and I'm getting eczema. Perhaps it has to do with my busy work lately." The dr then stopped typing on the computer, turned his head, looked at me with a serious look, and started lecturing me on how crazy I'm, not taking it easy and pushing myself so much while expecting. Yes, he was a bit far-fetched and was jumping to conclusion too fast, especially when he said, "would you be pushing your kid the same way you push yourself, and forcing him/her to learn this and that at a young age, like those parents depriving their children of a real childhood!" I assured him that I won't do that but he was quite right saying that I'm probably thinking that I would only stop working when I go into labor. That's actually kind of what I intended to do- doing as much as possible before going on maternity leave. As I expected to be really busy after the baby comes, this is the only and last time that I can focus on work, not to mention that my tenure application is due right before my mat leave. Anyhow, I walked out of the dr's office feeling misunderstood (as a psychologist, I'm very sensitive about people making assumptions about others). I felt that he didn't understand what I've given up (and ready to give up) for my child. But after talking to some people about this, I gradually realized that his being mad about me not slowing down enough was indeed to some extent justified. I need to relax, for my baby.
As the third trimester starts, I have made up my mind that I'm going to make a conscious effort to be lazier.:) It's about resisting the temptation to be this hardworking, tough, responsible, devoted teacher, researcher, colleague, friend, whatever even during pregnancy.
